What I’ve Learned In Aspen

Reminding people how much money you have will get you whatever your heart desires.
If someone earns less than you, treat them like a pile of steaming dog feces.
If you’re having trouble getting what you want, throw a tantrum.
The person with the most expensive car ALWAYS has the right-of-way.
The phrase “Don’t you know who I am?” automatically excuses you from all responsibility.
“Local” is synonymous with “peon”.
Trees and mountains are infinitely more beautiful than people.
I need a change of residence.